I shouldn’t Be Alive Today – TBT

Whats up beautiful people how you doing it’s your boy jagged I hope this one finds very well it is fast day meaning we have another Timothy I don’t know how many I have left but for some very strange reason they are becoming more intense as we go along in November of 2011 long before I was a father long before I was a guy who cared about continuous growth long before I was a business online and entrepreneur I was faster from November 2011 was the first time I was taken to rehabilitation because stuff had just gone south someone asked me the other day why am I looking what I have now have a different life I have a decent home have an amazing family I have this amazing company and you might say well a lot of people have that they’re not vlogging the thing is I had been told in 2011 that I would never come back I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder I was a fully fledged alcoholic but as Amy went to rehab the first time house doing two liters of vodka a day just a sec don’t know what madness is going on here it’s a lot of noise making I think Buddha Buddhas no surprises there I’m trying not going to a very deep detail of it because we’ll make this vlog really long I’ll just try to like every client I went Mombasa are we other so September 2011 are disappointed ready people that was with depression so had a lot of Education a very unstable I left work had an amazing job on up with dental in one else going I just woke up one day decided enough so I left went Mombasa for I think three weeks when our dead Celtic wife repeatedly I tried three times consecutive as I drove on dosing on all this medication I’ve been given that in lock bar I woke up the next day and had thrown up all the tablet and all of the MA still intact in the cops stuff second time I tried using a clothing line and break the job either below staying at night right hugging myself of that and the combat bro cause really drunk so I plucked a little morning woke up and realized that hidekatsu had made a friend there was a bitch was highly suspect I convinced him that I needed a guardrail fuses and he made a few calls and blood he got me revolve out three rounds and so I remember it was afraid considered in the villa by myself enjoying my drink and I decided as soon as these bodies are not good and when the phone rings it was my grandma and my grandma just instinctively cells that was about to something drastic and she was crying on the phone and he said listen don’t do it don’t do this to yourself and so for the birthday McMenamin I opened up they just rode away a lot and I cried on the phone for long time end of she sends relatives to come pick me up and I went into rehabilitation I don’t know how good the sound is going to be there’s a lot of fun yet no it’s somewhat and it’s right where I went record another link page when I get back I’m on my way to a client meeting I usually shoot these things like a dutiful husband and a really starts today at word easily visit is anonymous Messina Atlantic like this yeah tell me more raishin chase chase chase [Music] a long day productive day but long day they can get out of athletic clothes fast there’s nothing quite as refreshing as some water therapy so here’s what I’ve learned from being in rehab two times and this is true for brothers and sisters who are trying to get rid of addiction as it is for people with emotional disorders as it is for anyone who is trying to change anything significant in their like that nothing ever changes until you wake up one day and decide enough I want better for myself and I’m going to do whatever it takes to get that don’t expect change almost everything truly worthwhile is on the other side of your fears what that means is all those things that you’re earning for all those things that you’re hoping for an aspiring to yeah they’re not going to come to you in your comfort zone there’s going to be this value of challenge and care that you’re going up to go through and I can tell you that with a certain degree of certainty because every single time I left ring abouts terrified about what waited for me outside from every single time I tried something brand new I was terrified yeah but I kept doing it long enough and I began to see the pattern every time I’m faced is something that really terrifies me on the other side of it is the thing I really want so that career change that relationship you’re trying to get out or that relationship that you’re hoping for or that situation in your life or your family that you’re trying to better it’s on the other side of those things that are making you fear for three and this is kind of critical you deserve to love and care for yourself I didn’t get it until very recently loving yourself genuinely and truly and caring for yourself is not a selfish act do the things that it takes to nurture yourself so I really really need to end this vlog here it’s getting too long but I cannot and before I give you a quick status updates we now have 65 subscribers you’re loyal thank you for liking thank you for sharing thank you for subscribing keep coming back I think this might be the last TBT by the way I’m not sure I’ll let you know but if it is don’t worry don’t wet not fit because daily vlogs Stocki very shortly also also also cause it also also if you haven’t subscribed subscribe here’s my promise to you I will always make sure that the content that comes to you through this channel is content that leaves some positivity in your life.

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